In Our Own Way

My sweet friend JACKIE (AKA MY HONEY) nominated me to participate in a little challenge, where you share pictures of some of your older art.

This has proven to be a little difficult for me, because I've only been sincerely arting it up for a few years...and shared 99.9% of my art here on the blog...so you've probably already seen it!

And then I wondered if I've ever shown the canvases I did in the past...and I think the answer is no, so here you go:

I copied this mermaid from something I saw on Pinterest...so long ago I have no idea who's work it was, so I apologize!  I was really pleased over how she turned out at the time...now I see all kinds of things I coulda/shoulda/woulda done differently.  I guess it just goes to show that I've gotten to be a better artist over time!

This girl is the same way...all the stuff I learned between then and now is calling my name!  I do still enjoy her hair (which is scrapbook paper!) and I still find her mouth to be saucy and happy-making!  Also, I just noticed that dry erase board underneath the canvas says November...I just looked over at it...it actually says November 2012...clearly I don't use that dry erase board as much as I once thought I would...

The background on this one was my favorite...and the sentiment is one that I stick by too!  I used alcohol inks to make the background on all these canvases and this one looked like plaid to me and made me very happy!

All three of these canvases are hanging on the wall in my studio...they remind me of how far I've come in my art!  Even my lettering skills have improved since then, despite the fact that I've not really practiced it like I claimed I would (and keep claiming!)...this must support my theory that any kind of art practice improves your art over all...so I may not have been practicing lettering, but I was fiendishly practicing other things and better lettering was a happy byproduct!

Before taking up art/art journaling, I was creative in other ways.

Like sewing:

Made for my nephew Michael, from a Simplicity pattern.

Made up my own pattern for her!

Made from a pattern from a book called Wee Wonderfuls, which is a FANTASTIC book on soft toy making!  

I also embroidered:

Elephant, from a pattern

From my imagination

Crocheted:

Actually, I crocheted A LOT...this was from a pattern from LUCY AT ATTIC24...at one point, crochet was like art journaling is for me now and I was quite the little busy hooker! (haha)

And I did dabble in painting as well...just not the journaling kind:

He's a magnet...he still makes me laugh every time I look at him!

And this is Stanley, my Mom's "gentleman caller"...also hilarious, in my opinion...

I was thinking about all my past arting and crafting as I worked on this week's JOURNAL 52 spread.  (The prompt is "Silhouettes".)

I decided to use some of my MANY stamps that I never use...

While I've not always been an art journaler, I have always been a creative person.  My sister and I used to joke that I was "a craft acquiring junkie"...if I saw it and liked it, I had to try it...HAD TO.

I love those little stamp gals...so cute!  I went over the stamp lines in black marker to darken them and to give them a more 'drawn' look...it's a great way to cheat if you're not good at drawing, plus tracing things will help your hand get the feel of drawing, which will help you be a better draw-er...it sounds crazy, but it's true!

Now I think I must have just been searching for the right thing for me.  Don't get me wrong,  I do tend to love all things creative...and there was a time that I thought making soft toys was my passion and that crochet was my one true talent...but when I started art journaling...OH BABY!  It's a whole different kettle of fish!

"We must all be beautiful in our own way."

But that doesn't mean those years spent on other creative endeavors were wasted...or that sewing or knitting or jewelry making or writing or any other creative act is any less artistic.  It only means that we can define art in many ways...and that they are equally valid and important.

When I look at my beginning art stuff, I cringe a little, because I can see so many flaws.  But, while I do see those glaring flaws in my work, I can say that those works are still beautiful in their own way. All those flaws led me to become better.  In a couple more years, I will look at my current work and hopefully be able to say that it too is flawed but led me to improve even further.  

Sometimes the beauty in our art is not in the outward appearance of it.  Sometimes the beauty comes from a hidden meaning only we know.  Sometimes it comes from the years of hard work it represents.  And sometimes it comes from the fact that we were brave enough to try something new.

So my spread today is meant to encourage myself (and hopefully you too!) to find the beauty in everything around me, especially when it's not readily evident.  

Documented Life Week 4...Too Severe To Be Easily Forgotten

Have you ever had something happen to you...something you never thought bothered you...and all of the sudden, this thing hits you like a ton of bricks?  And you're so completely taken back by this thing...this stupid thing that never mattered before...that it's all you can think about?

It happened to me this week, and it's what's my Documented Life spread for today is about.  (You can read more about DL HERE.)

Do you remember being at school, and a group of the 'cool' kids would be talking and some kid would walk by and one of them would say to the other, "Look, Jeremy, there's your girlfriend.",  and it was always the dorkiest, grossest, 'loser' kid in the school?  I know you know what I'm talking about.

Well, more or less, that happened to me at work...I was the 'girlfriend'.

Now, when forced to think about my appearance, I tend to take a realistic view.  I know I'm not the hottest thing on the block...I know I'm not stopping traffic or getting cat calls or whistles or whatever it is that babes get these days...*cough...herpes...cough...cough*  But, I'm also not a total hideous beast-monster...nobody's eyeballs start spouting blood when they look at me or anything like that.

Additionally, I'm 30... I work at a factory...theoretically, with other 'adults'...should I even have to be talking about this?  Seriously...

My less...noble...side wants to divert attention to someone else and say 'You think I'm the worst looking person in this place?  Have you seen that girl...at least I cover my shame.'  ...I'm not proud of that...but it's true... 

'secretly, deep inside' (acrylic over writing, colored pencil, canvas stickers)

The stupid thing about it is that I always thought I didn't care how people felt about my looks.  Why should I care?  I have basically no control over it.  I mean think about it, barring plastic surgery, what am I supposed to do?  Besides, I'm an awesome person...that should totally make up for whatever I lack in the looks department.

Generally, I would just laugh things like this off...heck, I'd probably be the first one making the joke about myself.  But when faced with the thought that I am the most hideous person someone can point out in a building full of people...well, I guess my pride felt a line was crossed.

'I forget if I love you or not' (acrylic over writing, multiple stencils, canvas stickers, die-cuts, book pages,and Heidi Swapp ColorShine spray)

The whole thing just brought up a bunch of weird feelings for me.  Not that I go around thinking I'm a gorgeous super model or anything, but this situation made me feel ugly.  

I know the important thing is how I view myself...but the thing is, I never think of myself in terms of 'pretty' or 'ugly'...I look in the mirror and I see someone who is smart and funny and kind...I don't think about it the other way.  And I love that about myself!  And really, I always kind of figured it was up to other people to decide if I'm good looking or not.  I mean, 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder', right?  I know its my job to make sure I'm pretty on the inside...and I try really hard to accomplish that!  But as far as the outside...once I shower and brush my hair and make sure I don't have any visible boogers in my nose or something stuck in my teeth, I feel like my job is pretty much done...  But whatever small amount of vanity I have never thought I'd be on the receiving end of a "Jeremy's girlfriend" comment either...

I guess now we know for sure...

My husband finds this whole thing hilarious...and I say "Yuck it up, you're the one who married my ugly butt!"  He always calls me 'low-maintenance', but after being hit by a barrage of "do you think I'm cute?" all week, he might be forced to reexamine that theory...

This is all a little silly, really, and I know it.  But the project is to document life, right?  And life is the good and the bad and all the in-between stuff.  I don't know why I let it bother me so bad...I'm pretty well over it now...I guess the only thing I'm really certain of...is that I am NOT Jeremy's girlfriend.

Art for Anna

A while back...a long while back...my friend Anna sent me a fabulous care package FULL of goodies.  I take pride in being really good at packing, but if I'm good at packing, Anna invented it...I have NO idea how she got so much stuff in that box.  It was a modern day miracle!

So because I am the worst procrastinator ever, it took me a long time to make a reciprocation package for her.  In my defense, I wasn't really procrastinating, I was just trying extra hard to make awesome things for her...I got inside my head a little bit and freaked out...that's the true story... *hangs head in shame*  I don't know why I have such a hard time making art FOR other people.  I don't have a hard time making art for me...it must be my violent need for approval...  I just want to do a really good job so that they will still love me!

In addition to various bits...aka stuff to use in her own art (scrapbook paper, ephemera, etc.)...here's what I sent to Anna:

Back side of a tag I made...I cut my own tag out of watercolor paper.  I have an insanely strong desire to go buy those fabulous manila shipping tags that other artists are using so ingeniously...but I am trying SO HARD to be good and not do it.  I have so much good stuff to use that I feel like I need to use a lot of what I have before I go get more.  I REALLY don't want to do that though...what I really want is to max out my credit cards for art supplies.  BUT I've done good to this point, and just cut my own tag.  A tag cut out of watercolor paper is stronger and better anyway (she said bitterly to herself).

Here's the front of the same tag as above.  I did a little collage from the already gone months of this year's calender.  I also used a Martha Stewart foil embossing kit I got on clearance (so long ago I can't even tell you when) and some tiny heart confetti that my sister gave me.  Collage is not my forte, but I love this and I hope Anna does too...I am a big fan of the various funky ribbons...

This is the main/big piece I made for Anna.  It's on canvas!  This is the best thing I've done to date on a canvas.  I don't know what the deal is with me and canvases, but we hate each other...SO MUCH!  But this canvas has me rethinking my canvas hatred...  I am super happy with how she turned out...especially her lip area...her lips make me so happy I could scream...AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!  I'M SO HAPPY ABOUT YOUR LIPS!!!   ...oh, and modeling paste hair is the way to go for me...modeling paste hair all the way...lovely texture that is even better in person (if I do say so myself...so humbly)

The non-Adam-looking Adam...

The last picture is the thing that held up all the other things.  I was trying to draw her a picture of Adam Levine, because she and my other friend Pamikins have the hots for him in the most ardent way...but I can't draw Adam Levine.  I know, I know...I always say anyone can draw anything, but I was wrong...Adam Levine is my personal exception to the rule.  I had to have drawn twenty versions of him, and not a single one came remotely close to looking like him.  On a side note, Adam Levine, despite Anna's and Pamikins' love for you and despite the fact that you have freckles (which are usually very endearing to me), you are now my nemesis.  

This sketch was the best one I did, despite the fact that it looks nothing like who it's supposed to look like, I ended up liking the sketch very much...the only sketch out of the multiple sketches I did that did not end up getting gesso poured over them/crumpled in anger and frustration then gesso erased.  This guy, I love though...I don't know what it is about him, but I loved him, and I almost didn't send him to Anna because I am a selfish heifer...but in the end, my love for Anna prevailed and I sent non-Adam-looking Adam to live with her.  

I hope Anna will like/can use the goodies in her care package...I hope I sent just the right kind of things to make her happy!   ...you know, cause I love her and stuff...

ICAD, Art Journal and Canvas Hooray!

First, a big thanks to everybody for helping me hit 3,000 page views!  You guys made me do the happy dance today!  It wasn't too long ago that I was doing the happy dance over 2,000...I am going to have to start thinking about some kind of giveaway for when I hit 5,000...it's going to creep up on me and I'll be unprepared if I'm not careful!  If anybody has any ideas on that, I'm open to suggestions...

So I got to do some artsy stuff today, and I'm super excited about it!  I'm always super excited, aren't I?  It's like I'm bipolar, but only ever visit the one pole, you know what I mean?  

Up first is my ICAD card, which I'm cheating on and doing two prompts in one card, because I messed up my order royally and now I'm just confused and scared!  Help!  Help!  

This card is 3x5 and the prompts were 'your name in block letters' and 'logo':

I think I failed at block letters...I don't think there are supposed to be curves in block letters...but I didn't research that first, and so I ended up with this.   I did get to use some of my FANTABULOUS Silks acrylic glazes to color it in...I am not one for glittery things usually, but EGADS! I love those things so much!  This whole week for ICAD is bound to be a do-over, because I just went cuckoo or something.  The 'logo' part is my stylized little red clover.  I've used it before, hit and miss, but I like it quite a lot and I think it will be my signature from now on, mostly because it keeps me from having to sign my name in my terrible 12-year-old boy handwriting...  (Who am I kidding?  Even 12-year-old boys have better handwriting than me!)

Next I did a page (or really a two-page spread) in one of my art journals:

This is not my usual thing...  The colors and the collage-y look are both out of the norm for me.  This was kind of an experiment page.  I used some muslin I had painted black (I painted the muslin forever ago, testing out some textile medium I had bought.)  On the right page, behind the stamped image (the one that is not torn) is the scrap piece of paper I used underneath the muslin when I painted it...isn't that a neat effect how the paint came through all randomly?  I think it's a pretty nifty pattern!  The stamped images were also me testing things out.  Same stamp, in different inks (some images then covered in perfect pearls) on pages from my old Spanish/English dictionary.  I colored some of the pages using alcohol inks as well to make them look more aged...they were already pretty old, but not quite as darkly antique colored as they are now.  The journaling says: "I think somewhere along the way I have been torn apart and I must spend the rest of my life piecing myself back together." 

And finally, the thing I am REALLY super excited about:

Woo Hoo!!!   My bird at sunrise painting!  He's on an 8x10 canvas.  I would just like to mention that I do NOT like working on canvases.  I know it's because I'm just not used to them, but ARG!  I much prefer my safe and easy watercolor paper!  ...but I will keep practicing on the canvases.   One day, I will probably look back at this post and say what a weenie I was for not liking to work on canvas.  As much as I disdained working on the canvas, I am so very, very happy with how the painting turned out!  And look, I even used my little red clover to sign it with!  Squeeee!  It makes me so happy!

I did the painting along with the completely awesome (and very nice) Marc Charles from Painting with Marc on YouTube.  Some darling amigas from one of the Facebook groups I am in suggested watching his first video (I made an ICAD card using what I learned in the video...you can see the result in my last post).  Now, I am HOOKED!  

Here is the video for your viewing pleasure...and listening pleasure (I LOVE his accent!  *sigh*  It's just delicious, I swear I could listen to him read the dictionary!):

He does such a great job of teaching you how to do things!  I am enamored with him and his art and his style of teaching!  He kindly accepted a Facebook friending from me, and, let me just say, he is such a sweetie pie!  So go subscribe to his channel on YouTube and go friend him (and me, of course!) on Facebook and see just how wonderful he really is!  I think I am going to end up doing all of his tutorials, so be forewarned: You will be hearing about Marc again!

So those are my major accomplishments for the day...what did you get into?

I Picked These For You!

What a crazy busy week I've had!  I look back on it and it seems like nothing too out of the ordinary happened, but geez Louise, it flew by!  

Work always steals a lot of time, but I do need to eat and buy art supplies, so I have to give up 40 hours there, plus drive time.  

Sleep takes up the next largest amount, but only by a small margin.  Sleep and I have an awkward relationship, where I'd like to see more of him, but he's comfortable maintaining a healthy distance.  It's sad really, because I'd love to take our relationship to the next level...

Then, of course, there's a mild amount of house cleaning that I do.  And when I say 'mild amount', what I really mean is just enough cleaning to keep a clear path from the bedroom to the fridge, fridge to craft room, craft room to bathroom...and just enough for us not to catch scurvy or some other horrible disease...after that, I don't mind so much.  We have a really small house.  No matter how clean you get it, it always looks cluttered...so I don't like to waste a lot of time and energy trying to fix that...because it is an effort in futility.  I have a sneaky plan to help alleviate some of this problem, but it's still in the works, and I don't want to jinx it.  You'll hear more about it when it gets closer to becoming a reality...until then, I will leave you in suspense...

I wanted to share what I made for my (birth) mother, Marian, (not to be confused with my sister, Marian...she's a Marian Junior...nor to be confused with my work mom, Miss Lettie) for Mother's day/just because she is sweet and adorable (and it happened to coincide with Mother's Day).  I'm late in showing it, because I didn't want her to see it on the blog (she reads my blog because she loves me and stuff...) before I actually gave it to her.  

I picked these for you!

I wish I could have gotten a little better picture.  The light has been bad recently, due to copious amounts of rain...which, I must say, was supposed to have happened in April (you know, April showers bringing May flowers and all), but the rain clearly did not get that memo this year.  So I'm going to blame that...  In real life, this piece is much less dingy (?) looking, especially the daisies.

This piece is acrylic on canvas, and it is meant to look like the flowers are closer to you and I am farther away, like I'm handing the flowers out to her.  And before someone asks, yes, this is supposed to be me when I was a little girl.  And yes, my hair was THAT long (I could sit on it) when I was a kid.  And yes, I had gappy teeth when I was a little girl.  And yes, I still have gappy teeth as a (newly) 30 year old.  And no, not a cute little gap, but a (cute) big gappy gap.  And no, it does not make me able to spit farther, nor can I whistle through it on purpose, although sometimes it happens on accident...(for some reason, those are the two questions I get asked the most about my gappy teeth...if you have a question about my gappy teeth, I will be happy to answer it if you leave it in the comment section below...trust me, you will not offend me in any way, so just ask, and I'll do my best to satisfy your curiosity...)

You may notice a striking lack of eyeballs in this piece, and before you go around thinking I don't have eyeballs or that I just forgot to paint them, let me clear the air.  My 12 year old nephew, who lives with my mom, is utterly creeped out by inanimate objects having eyeballs.  He is of the opinion, as many people are, that they follow him around the room...but instead of being an interesting phenomenon, to him it is terrifying.  I try not to judge too much...I personally have an irrational fear of space aliens.  Snakes, spiders, axe murderers...you know things that could actually hurt me...I have no problem with...but space aliens creep me out so bad.  The worst part is that I don't even think they're real!  I therefore understand the ridiculousness of that fear...but it doesn't matter, I still have the uncontrollable desire to scream in horror when I think about them.  So, like I said, I don't judge my nephew for being freaked out by things 'watching' him.  Since I knew my mom would hang this painting up (because, you know, she loves me and stuff), out of consideration for my nephew, I chose to leave the eyeballs 'out of frame'.  But I do have eyeballs...and gappy teeth...in real life.

Wednesday

Here's my most recent girl:

My older sister asked me what her name was...and I didn't know...I didn't know naming them was a thing.  But, I thought about it...and decided that her hair reminded me of Morticia Addams (from The Addams Family), but Morticia wouldn't wear a green sweater...  So I think she must be Wednesday all grown up and out on her own.  

Wednesday is done on canvas...the background is alcohol ink.  I used Prismacolors and acrylic paint, as well as water colors.  Her hair is scrapbook paper!  Isn't that a neat technique/idea?  My favorite thing is her mouth, because I think it makes her look saucy.  I feel like I got the highlight just how I wanted too, which is something I've been practicing.

I really need to work on taking better pictures, or at least at having a more interesting background, instead of having my paneling and paperclips showing!  Although those paperclips are both useful and colorful, so they're not too bad I guess!