So Long

And here we are...counting down the last day of 2014!

This year seems to have flown by!  Especially the second half...for me, from September on was a total blink of an eye.  It was crazy!

For this last post of the year...the post that completes my year as well as my December blog-a-thon (hooray!)...I thought I would share a few of the highlights of 2014...

In January, I was having fun with one of Jane Davenport's workshops:

This was for Jane Davenport's "Supplies Me" workshop.

It was also the beginning of my two year long art projects, Journal 52...

This page remains one of my favorites...one of the ones that I am most proud of!

...and Documented Life:

This was documenting a very sad thing, the passing of my dog, Nunu...he was such a good boy, but his passing away brought an end to a painful illness, and there's comfort in the fact that he's not in pain anymore.

In February, I had a rant about a co-worker, but this lovely page came out of it:

Her horns/tiny head trees are my favorite part...I adore them!

I started a short and frustrating trip into abstract art, that still goads me every time I think about it...

Then I tried my hand at a Mindy Lacefield inspired spread and found I liked that much better:

I've ended up with several Mindy Lacefield inspired pieces, but this was the first and probably my favorite...

I also realized that my desire for freedom isn't new to me...I've wished for it since I was a child:

I didn't remember this page, but maybe in 2015, I'll reach my lifelong dream of attaining freedom...

In March, I thought a lot about who I was...

...made with some home-made stencils I did a tutorial for (also in March)...

...and who I wanted to be:

"Now and Then"
I started understanding that if I wanted to get to the colorful and happy place on the right, I'd have to push through fear as illustrated on the left.

In April, I thought more about being afraid:

Another one of my favorite pages...I think she's so cool!

I worked on some personal stuff...

I love the color combo of the olive-ish green and the rosy carmine...

...and started a project that I later came to realize was better left unfinished:

My collage skills were improving by leaps and bounds, but I was backsliding to an emotional state that was better left in the past...I do need to get back to collages though...I was getting better at them!

May saw a couple mermaids (and me admitting that I like washing dishes):

...if I were a mermaid, I'd be a chunky one...but my tail would be fantastic!

This is another happy-making page for me...her arms and hands came out relatively normal looking! ☺

I also remembered that change comes from within and got a little confrontational with someone who had done me wrong (so out of character for me!):

...the shading on the ball of her nose turned out surprisingly well!

In June, I got experimental!  I made my first (and, so far, only) mandala:

...not too hideous for a first attempt, right?

...tried my hand at playing the Glad Game:

...I also started noticing a run of purple in my art that month...

...got to do an artist interview with my sweet and talented friend Jackie (aka My Honey):

Isn't My Honey an amazing artist?  I adore her and her work!

I also did a video talking about my art and myself...and I got all scientific on you:

...there was an informative discussion about what a 'line' actually is, involving time, our lifespan, and vampires...my mind is so weird...

July saw more science:

Real life anglerfish are NOT as cute as this guy is...

...participation in Summer of Color:

That wolf sure loves that girl...

...me making wishes:

...still looking for those things...

...and my realizing how appalling 'fashion' has gotten in recent times and how I would dress if I could:

check out those gams...

In August, I realized that I'm probably a psychic, but most of the time I don't know what I'm talking about:

The reference photo that I used for the above girl is one I keep coming back to...she's on my Pinterest board, "Photograph".

In September, I had an awesome beach trip with my mom!  Artistically, I played with texture, made some cards, and realized that some things can't be let go of quickly:

the olive green and carmine make their second appearance

I got my feathers ruffled:

That crow napkin is still awesome...I wish I had a million of them...

...and I started seeing things connect:

Leonardo was right...

October heard me bemoaning the fact that my mom and I couldn't stay at the beach indefinitely...and it heard me celebrating as well:

...after MANY attempts, a decent face in profile was drawn!

I thought about what was dear to my heart:

...also reminded you that Bambi was, in fact, a boy...

and magic was made:

...still NOT Tinkerbell...

November came with some baggage:

...we hold too much inside of ourselves sometimes, don't we?

but also contained acceptance:

...gratitude:

...and realizing I've still got some fight in me:

And finally December...it started out with a scare that THANKFULLY ended much better than it could have.

I participated in Reverb14 (my first Reverb ever!), which was fantastic and reminded me how much I enjoy writing (which has taken a backseat to art for quite a while).  I learned a lot about myself...

...finished off a bunch of pages where there was a background but nothing else...

where I wanted to be:

This page is laughably bad!  (but laughing's good, so it can't be all bad, right?  ...right???)

...and what I hope for the future.

Adora-bunny...

I wrapped up Journal 52 with an important reminder:

...better keep learning then!

and Documented Life with a little whimsy:

I've never been happier that my name starts with an "A"!

...thus completing TWO year-long art projects and proving that I CAN finish what I start!

-

And that brings us up to date with today, December 31...

...still celebrating the cleanliness of the desk!

...where I thought I send 2014 off with a little bit of fun...

Followed a tutorial I found on Pinterest to make this cartoony horse...you can find the tutorial on my "Copycat With Respect" board.

With many thanks for all it's taught me, I say:

SO LONG 2014!

Circle Back And Keep Learning

The prompt for JOURNAL 52 this week is "Circle".  This is the last prompt for this first year of J52...I can't believe it!  It seems like we only just got started!

Many thanks to Chelle (the generous lady behind J52) for all the hard work she put into this project!  She came up with some really awesome prompts, and I can't wait to see what she has in store for the future.  I can honestly say that I have learned so much and been stretched creatively and mentally/emotionally by this fantastic project. <3

Chelle mentioned in this week's post (linked above) the idea of bringing something to a close and the little twinge of sadness that goes along with it.  But she also called to mind that, as one thing comes to an end, something else begins...hence the "circle" prompt.

For me, there is a huge sense of accomplishment that goes along with Journal 52's inaugural year reaching completion...but I'd be lying if I said I don't feel that twinge of sadness here at the end of this first year!  (Thank goodness J52 will continue in 2015!)

One of my biggest goals in 2014 was to "not be a flake"...in other words, to see something through to the end.  And now here I am, with this last piece of that puzzle in my hands. In a day or two, I'll have completed my second year-long project (Documented Life).  All that's left of this year's J52 journal is to decorate my cover...and then it's over...it's complete...I did it.  I reached my goal and I proved to myself that I can stick with something...I am a finisher...I can do anything I put my mind to...wow.

Just wow.

And so, my friends, I present to you the last page of 2014's Journal 52 journal, a major milestone in both my creative journey and my personal growth:

Had to pick happy colors to balance out the blues that I was feeling over this being the last page!

I was thinking about those "Groundhog's Day" type movies when I did this piece...you know, the ones where the main character has to live the same day over and over until they get it right...

"It won't let go until you learn."

...I was thinking about how life really is like that in a way...how we seem to circle back to things, how we find ourselves in the same situations we've been in before, feeling the same way we've felt in the past, telling ourselves we'll never let a certain thing happen again and before we know it we're right back at it...

And I came to the conclusion that we can't free ourselves from those circles until we learn...until we honestly learn.  And just like in those movies, it's not up to anyone else...we're Bill Murray and we're the only ones who can change things...and if we don't, we're the ones who are doomed to repeat the same things time and again for the rest of our lives.

This last page of my J52 journal is to lovingly remind myself, to keep it fresh in my mind for 2015, that I'm the one who has to change...I'm the only one who has the power to make life better or to let it be the same as it always has been.

And I choose change.

A loving little reminder...

Like I mentioned at the beginning, all that's left to do is the cover and 2014's J52 journey will be complete.  I'll work on it and share that with you sometime before January (I better get a move on...not too many days left!) and I'll try to include all the 52+ pages (some weeks I was an overachiever) in that same post, so be on the lookout!

For now, I'm off to watch a little Sherlock and finish off my Documented Life journal...

Hello New Year, Nice to Meet You...

2014, you have started off so well!

For some reason, I've had the biggest sense of optimism and hope for 2014.  This is not like me.  Usually, a year is just another year, a man-made way of marking time.  They generally go by without too much attention from me.  I don't think in terms of such long spaces of time...I get from day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute...years encompass too much for my tiny brain to comprehend.

The thought of 2014 has been different for me.  Maybe because of all the changes 2013 held, who knows...  But I've gotten the strangest feeling that this year is going to be epic...that HUGE positive things are going to happen.  What those things are, how they're going to come about, I have no clue...I just know I feel this optimism so strongly that it's a little eerie.  I joked at work on Monday that either good things were going to happen or I was going to get hit by a bus on the way home...because irony and morbid humor is how I roll...and since I didn't get hit by a bus so far, I guess we'll see how it all pans out...

I do know that it's already started off pretty well...so one day down, three hundred and sixty-four to go.  I got my Morning Pages (these are a suggestion from The Sound of Paper by Julia Cameron) done first thing this morning.  A friend I met through KIOS blog-a-thon (Hi Kara!) mentioned a 30 day challenge she was participating in called Root: A 30 Day Journal Project (which you can learn more about HERE), and I jumped on the bandwagon.  As far as I can tell from Day 1, it seems like more of a writing project.  Which is totally cool with me, because the thought of doing Morning Pages on days when nothing particular is going on makes me think Morning Pages will become tedious...and then I will quit doing them.  So I figure for January I'll have the Root prompts to get me into Morning Pages and then I'll have developed the habit of writing again and will figure it out for myself...or at least will have till February to find more prompts.  I used the Root prompts today and got my Morning Pages done pretty quickly and probably could have kept going.

Today was also the first day of the Documented Life Project (you can read more about DL HERE), which I have been waiting ever so impatiently for.  I jumped on the ball and did the first of the weekly challenges today...I told you I was impatiently waiting!

The first DL challenge is "photograph, sketch, paint, or incorporate your front door".

I cheated a little bit.  I did take a picture of my door, but technically my house doesn't have a front door...both outside doors are on the sides of the house...so I just took a picture the door I use.  Here it is in all it's dirty, anti-climactic glory:

This picture made me realize I need to clean...I'll wait for a warmer day...  (that day is probably called never, but theoretically  it does seem like something to keep in mind for spring...)

I cheated a little bit more when it came to putting the prompt to use in my DL book, because of what the blurb underneath the main prompt (on the website I linked above) said:

"Through the artistic medium of your choice, show us a bit of where you live in the symbol of your door, entryway or porch.  Think a bit about how you can use your door to express your personality, your life, what you value."

And when I thought about it in those terms, I realized that my actual front door didn't symbolize anything about me...other than my lack of desire to clean.  So I started thinking about it in terms of what a front door as a symbol meant to me, which led me to think about a home, and what a home symbolizes to me.  And here's what I came up with:

The first spread in my Documented Life book...YAY!

In the end, the front door (although not MY front door...egads, that might be a little more telling than I realized at first...some kind of psychological slip...well that'll be over-analyzed later...) was a warm and welcoming thing...a symbol of the place where I belong.

"A place where I belong"

I added all these little bits (most of them from care packages sent by dear artistic friends) to the page today, and they  fit in quite nicely with the idea the prompt brought about.  The sticker in the top right corner says 'Create a life you love.'  and I thought that was a fitting sentiment for starting off the new year...  I also love the sticker on the bottom that says 'homemade', because it is in a homemade (ok, home-altered) journal, with the door on the page (symbolizing home), and in connection with creating a life you love, I read it as Home. Made...meaning that 'place where I belong' is something I have to put forth effort to find or make if I can't find what I'm looking for...

Andy (my husband) and I went to IHOP for dinner tonight, which was a nice surprise...we rarely go out to eat (drive-thru happens a lot, but sit down eating not so much), we even more rarely go to IHOP, and in the few instances where we do eat in the restaurant, we usually end up talking about it for weeks before it actually happens.  (We're weird...)  But today, Andy surprised me, and that was really awesome!  It may not seem like much, but after ten years of being married, silly things that don't usually happen somehow become bigger and more special.  Andy is a creature of habit more than anyone else I've ever met, so for him to be spontaneous...it was a big thing.  

On the way home, we stopped at Walmart, which I usually hate beyond hate, but I got myself some new Washi tape (8 rolls!  WooHoo!  It was on clearance...she said by way of justification...).  The purchase of said Washi, combined with Walmart not being jammed with people (for once!) made this particular trip...not horrible!  It also made me wonder if they have Walmart in other countries...I'm sure they do, but I wonder if they are the same as Walmart is here...and do people in other countries hate Walmart as much as I do?  Any thoughts on this are appreciated...

And then we came home and I started writing this, the first blog post of 2014!  So all in all, the new year has been pretty positive so far...maybe my completely irrational optimism isn't misplaced after all...

What about you?  Did you do anything special today?  Do you have your own irrational feelings about what 2014 is going to be like?  Or is it just another day and another year?  Do you hate Walmart too?  (If you don't hate Walmart, please explain why in detail...I need to be convinced...and it would take A LOT to convince me...)  Any fun new purchases you naughty things?

Word and Bird

While I haven't been doing the KIOS Blog-a-thon (because of my general slackitude), I have been following along, seeing what the prompts are and what everybody's writing about.  Today's prompt was one that caught my eye, because it's something I've had on my mind for the past month or so: word of the year.

In the past, I've kind of balked at the idea of 'word of the year', because it's really a goal.  And I don't like goals...they seem so restricting and boring and other negative words...like effort-requiring.  Ugh.  Effort.  Blah.

But for some reason, maybe because of the entire week off of work I've been enjoying...maybe because of my growing as a person...whatever reason...I've got the feeling I need to make a goal.  I like to think I'll try anything... Once.

And so, I've picked a word of the year for 2014:

CONDITION

Yep, that's it.  It's even in one of my art journals now, so it's pretty well concreted:

I'm really happy with the lettering and the inner coloring on this...I gotta fix the outside part...I just don't like it how it is.  It needs...more...I don't know...but it needs more something...

So anyways, condition:

con·di·tion

kənˈdiSHən/

noun

1. 1.

   the state of something, esp. with regard to its appearance, quality, or working order.

   "the wiring is in good condition"

   synonyms:

   state, shape, order
2. 2.

   the circumstances affecting the way in which people live or work, esp. with regard to their safety or well-being.

   "harsh working and living conditions"

   synonyms:

   circumstances, surroundings, environment, situation, setup, setting,habitat More

verb

1. 1.

   have a significant influence on or determine (the manner or outcome of something).

   "national choices are conditioned by the international political economy"

   synonyms:

   constrain, control, govern, determine, decide;
2. 2.

   bring (something) into the desired state for use.

   "a product for conditioning leather"

   synonyms:

   treat, prepare, prime, temper, process, acclimatize, acclimate, season

 That's kind of a funny word for someone who was just complaining about all things restricting/boring/requiring effort, right?  I know!  Crazy.  But it's one I really want to go with...it stuck on my brain like glitter...stuck like glitter to anything that comes into contact with glitter...  

I like condition as my 2014 word because it has so many meanings jammed into just a few letters...and they can pretty much all be applied to what I hope 2014 will be like.  

As in:

 My current condition is not bad right now.  I've made a lot of  progress on a personal level.  Big changes have been happening in me.  And that's great, totally awesome, self-back pat worthy...BUT I've still got some things I need to work on.  

So, like a Kung Fu master, I need to condition (or discipline...) myself to keep making positive changes in order to become the best Sweets I can.  

I also want to condition (like shampoo and condition) myself so I become a little softer.  Relearn what it's like to be innocent and good-hearted and to let things go.  I used to be so good at that, and I don't know what changed exactly, but in the spirit of 'fake it til you make it', I'm going to be good at it again.  

So...yay for CONDITION!

I am always trying to progress in my art stuff in general, but for 2014 I have some specific art goals...and I'm going to condition myself into succeeding at them.  

One of my goals is to get better at lettering.  I'm sure I've mentioned wanting to practice lettering before, but I'm really serious this time.  NO LAUGHING!  (...cause we're being serious...)  I've always struggled with my penmanship (yes, mom, I admit it...I should have practiced when I was a kid...you were right...*eye roll*...hehehe), and it drives me crazy when I make a good page and go to letter it and have instant sad face because I know my handwriting skills are close to nonexistent.  I know there are ways around that, like stamping letters or cutting them from magazines and books or using alphabet stickers...there are actually a lot of cool and fun options for lettering...BUT, I really want to be able to be proud of my own personal lettering skills.  I'm not looking to be the next Joanne Sharpe or anything, but I do want to improve...so-o-o much!  I am thinking of having a devoted lettering journal...and of practicing A LOT on lined paper as well.  The key to getting better at anything is just practice...and practice...and practice.  (Nod to my sister, Marian, for her mantra.)  

The other art goal for 2014 is to get better at realistic drawing.  I go through waves where I want real and then I want cutsie and then I want something else...but I think getting better at drawing more realistically will help me get better at drawing in general.  I think 2014 will be the Year of the Illustrated Journal.  I am thinking my illustrated journal will be pen and ink mainly...maybe throw in some watercolor washes...but the point will be in the drawing itself, so we'll see how it goes...  (full disclosure: it's basically a fact that there will be watercolor washes happening...).  And it will be real life drawing, no cartoonish silliness in this journal...as much as I can achieve that...  

I think the difference between illustrated journals and art journals (for me anyway) isthat art journals are more color, texture, collage, mixed media...and more MORE (if that makes sense at all.).  Illustrated journals are about drawing (illustration...it's in the name!).  I think some people use illustrated journal and art journal interchangeably...and they are probably right...but in my brain, that's the difference. 

And look, I even made a page in one of my current journals to illustrate Illustrated Journaling (Illustrate...just wanted to see if I could say it one more time.  Ha!):

Bird ornament - Illustrated Journal style!  Look at that white space...glorious.  I love layers of color and texture just as much as the next art junkie, but there's something to be said for big swatches of white space too...

Here is the bird in real life...sorry for the awkward picture, it was hard to get him to sit still...he's very round and was rolling all over the place.

So, to sum up 2014 goals: Condition.  Lettering.  Illustrated Journal.  

What about you?  Do you have any ambitions for the new year?  Or are you like my usual self: go with the flow and what happens happens?